


Of Trivial Misunderstandings and Awkward Confessions

by sodenoshirayuki_23



Category: Joker Game (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Warning for OOCness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-15
Updated: 2016-07-16
Packaged: 2018-07-24 02:12:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,324
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7489350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sodenoshirayuki_23/pseuds/sodenoshirayuki_23
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sakuma and Miyoshi had known each other since high school. They started dating during their uni days.  </p><p>It was just one question. He just had to ask Miyoshi, his lover for almost five years, one question. One simple question that will decide how their story will continue throughout the years.</p><p>Was asking someone to marry you always this hard?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is sorta still unbetaed so excuse typographical errors and grammatical errors! I should probably sleep now *cries*
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

_This is it._

 

Sakuma didn't know how many times have he said that in the last three weeks. All those times he repeatedly whisper that like a mantra deep in his soul, and all the same thinking twice about actually doing it. He needs to think this through more than a couple of times, but yes, this has been circling inside his mind for the last month.

 

Sitting on their couch on the living room, he continues to absentmindedly stare at the small crimson box resting on his hands. A tiny thing that is always seen on cliche movies and typical stories. Yet that "tiny" thing is actually worth a lot. Not only literally but also emotionally. That "tiny" thing that you have to present whilst kneeling like an idiot (as Hatano would comment), and wait for an answer only to get rejected (Jitsui really needs to look at the bright side sometimes). 

 

He did consider asking their friends for some suggestion. Jitsui and Hatano gave him the _"You-will-cry-after-kneeling_ " aura (Sakuma remembered when Kaminaga told him about Jitsui's S&M preference, it made him shiver and feel sorry for Hatano.) Cry either of happiness or sadness. They didn't specify but they made sure Sakuma can imply it's the latter. Sakuma expected their answers would be like that; after all, those two are going out for as long as him and Miyoshi have been but they never actually thought of marriage. Both doesn't want to get tied down by anything, or so they say. "If you know the person loves you, you know they won't leave even if there's no paper that can be easily crumpled certifying it."  -Jitsui straightforwardly tells him with a small smile. 

He couldn't really ask Amari as the man seems too busy raising his adopted child Emma. Fukumoto and Odagiri gave him an advice of "Go-for-it" even if their expressions says otherwise. Well, those two have always been the quiet type. They probably meant that, well, probably. 

Tazaki is studying abroad in the states so he couldn't really reach their pigeon-loving buddy and ex-classmate.

 

 

Kaminaga, on the other hand jokingly retorted that Marriage is not for Miyoshi. Sakuma almost agreed, if the former didn't immediately tell that he was joking. Sakuma remembered what Kaminaga told him then.

"You want to marry Miyoshi? Go ahead. Ask him. It's not exactly like what Jitsui and Hatano says. You see, you're marrying not because you're afraid that you'll lose the person without marriage. You're marrying because you love the person." Kaminaga said that with a soft expression that made Sakuma slightly think that the man wants to be married, too. The words Kaminaga said are weird coming from a playboy. Although maybe he's playing around with relationships because he hasn't found the one just for him yet. Sakuma placed his hand on the man's shoulder and patted him; earning a friendly swat and a fake sob with "Shut-up!". Even if Kaminaga is like that, Sakuma is more than happy to have a reliable friend such as him.

 

Back to the reality he's in, Sakuma sighs heavily.

 

It was just _one question_. He just had to ask Miyoshi, his lover for almost five years, one question. _One simple question_ that will decide how their story will continue throughout the years. After all, he had handled many ridiculous questions from their friends ranging from why is his answer to that math equation the only one wrong to someting more sensual such as his sex life with Miyoshi. Those guys just don't give up on making Sakuma's life awkward enough. But they are indeed friends he's still glad he have. It is through them indeed, that he met Miyoshi. He also had his share of answering questions that are observing and demanding from his boyfriend that could or could not push him to his limits. But it's alright since he loves Miyoshi. _Oh, he loves him so much._

 

Was asking someone to marry you always this hard?  

 

But just that one question, and Sakuma is trembling like a nervous highschool girl who is about to confess to her crush. Well, nervous seems to be an understatement of what and how he's feeling right now.

 

Sighing deeply for the umpteenth time, he decides it's now the right time to hide that small box and prepare dinner. Miyoshi will be home from work anytime soon. Speaking of work, he left work much earlier than usual to plan things on how to propose but it seems to no avail. He just wasted time, _Great Sakuma, Just great._

After what seems like an hour and a half of being problematic, he finally stands up and heads towards their room. If he didn't feel the urge to grab some drink to calm himself.

Entering the kitchen instead, he goes straight in front of the fridge. Transferring the hold of the tiny crimson box from his right hand to the left, he opens the door of the fridge with his right hand. Carefully scanning the fridge for what he can cook for dinner, he makes out some perfect ingredients for his boyfriend's favorite; curry. He forms a small smile at the thought of Miyoshi liking it, Miyoshi always does like his cooking even if he doesn't admit it. Sakuma knows, from the tiny of amusement in his eyes that even if his lips doesn't say _"It's delicious, Sakuma-san",_ his expression says it is.  Curry, it is. Sakuma nods approvingly before grabbing some pitcher of cold water. He closes the fridge and puts the pitcher on the counter as he prepares a glass. With the small box still on his left hand (He can't put it down, or he forgot to.) Pouring some contents of the pitcher, his mind reverts back on how to propose. He frowns and proceeds to drink the water.

 

 

 

 

"Sakuma-san, tell me we are having curry tonight."

 

The addressed man spits out the contents of his newly-drank cold water all over the air. Good thing he manages to turn to the opposite side of where Miyoshi is and quickly hide the cursed box inside his pocket pants. The man is standing a few meters away from him but the thought of spitting water in front of Miyoshi is _too risky_. Too risky for his twenty-five years old life. No, he wants to live for a long time more. The thought of Miyoshi also seeing the damned box is too risky. Sakuma collects his shocked composure and bring the glass on the counter. Good thing he had a strong grip otherwise it had fallen to a waste. (Or else he could have also dropped the box.) He inwardly cursed at how he didn't notice Miyoshi plunging the keys in the door key hole, entering the house and walking straight to him. Hell, he didn't even see or hear anything other than his thoughts. He must have been too consumed by his worries. 

 

Miyoshi raises an eyebrow, clearly not expecting Sakuma's reaction. He must have been tired from work and this isn't the welcome he wanted from his boyfriend.

 

"Miyoshi." Was all Sakuma could say.

 

"Spitting water  as an anwer to my question isn't what I expected from you." Miyoshi carefully drops his bag on a chair in the dining room connected to the kitchen. Staring at Sakuma again, Miyoshi awaits for his boyfriend to say something. 

"Ah, sorry. Uh," Sakuma pauses, "Yes?"

 

"So you're telling me you made out with a broom during your turn to clean the gym during university days?"

 

"What no." Sakuma is to preoccupied and confused to show extreme defiance and denial. He _didn't_ do that after all.

 

"Kidding." Miyoshi closes his eyes, not looking anywhere near joking. He cracks open his eyes again, "I was just saying I'm tired today. Stress from work isn't making my hair any better."

Miyoshi is speaking like this, so he must have not noticed. Sakuma internally sighed, no, he can't show any sigh of relief on the surface otherwise Miyoshi will notice and ask why he is relieved. 

"I'll go change. I'll help you cook dinner--"

 

"No, I can."

 

Miyoshi yet again raises his eyebrow. 

"No, I mean," Sakuma gulps, "...you're tired so I can do this." He tries his best to put on a smile which turned out to look too awkward.

 

 _I can't let you cook. Last time you did, You almost burned the whole kitchen. No, the whole house. Not only that, you'll see the ring--_ Sakuma thought to himself as he watched Miyoshi's retreating back. He breathes normally once Miyoshi has entered the room and this time, he heard the door lock of a room click. 

 

Sakuma grabs the pitcher and pours himself another round of glass before gulping it all in one go.   _Calm down,  Sakuma.  He didn't see. He didn't see._  He assured himself.  He sighs again,  before carrying the said pitcher back to the fridge.  Opening the door of the fridge, he pauses midway.  He better hide the ring now or better.  His right hand carrying the pitcher,  his free hand fishes his pockets for the small box.  Finally getting hold of it, he chuckles. _Why am i so nervous--_

 

 

 

 

"Sakuma-san.  Are you sure you need no help regarding cooking?"

 

Sakuma couldn't stop himself from uttering a silent curse as the fucking box drops on the floor.  He quickly sends a glance to their bedroom door just across the kitchen. Seeing only Miyoshi's back turned to him, he immediately grabs the damned box and secured it on his huge fist before his lover can turn to face him.  He thanked whoever deity made Miyoshi talk to him whilst he was doing something that made him not look at Sakuma's way.  

 

Miyoshi stares at him with indifference, that was when Sakuma remembered he was being asked a question.  He clears his throat,  "Uh, yes. I can,  honey.  I can. Don't worry."

 

His boyfriend sends him a calculating look that isn't helping to Sakuma's sweating. When Miyoshi nods in acknowledgement and returns back inside their room, Sakuma aimed to swiftly hide the box somewhere. 

 

 

 

 

"And also," Miyoshi's voice  made him jolt and he absentmindedly placed the tiny box inside the fridge and close it fast before Miyoshi could see it.  The only good thing he did is open the damned fridge earlier.

 

 _Shit.  The ring_ \-- Sakuma bites his lip when he realized his own stupidity done through his careless actions in a matter of not more than half an hour.   _Genius,  Sakuma,  Genius_. 

"Bauer-san is asking to take me out for dinner--"

"What--"

"--To talk regarding business." Miyoshi finishes even before Sakuma could get the wrong idea. The shorter man grins when he saw Sakuma's shoulder slump in relief. 

 

Miyoshi forms a smile as he approaches Sakuma.  Snaking his hand at the back of Sakuma's neck and pressing himself against him the moment they are close,  Miyoshi wasted no time on leaning up to place a chaste kiss on Sakuma's lips. "I know you're jealous of him,  but you need not to worry.  He's just a client at work; nothing more."

 

Miyoshi knew he won when Sakuma's attention are all his. When the taller man's eyes are locked with his,  and when said man is looking at him with undisguised love.

 

He bats his eyelashes playfully and Sakuma gulps. 

 

But in a fast movement, he pushes the older man with all his strength but not enough to hurt him much,  just away from the fridge. 

 

Miyoshi inches closer to the said thing. 

 

"Shit--"

 

"Don't move any closer.  Sakuma-san,  you're hiding something inside here."

 

"No,  I'm not." Sakuma tries to sound calm and composed,  but his voice says otherwise. 

 

"Yes, you are." Miyoshi insists as he stands up straight,  Sakuma knows this is his fighting stance.  After all,  Miyoshi is the champion on their nationwide Judo competition during that school event.  

 

"Miyoshi," Sakuma extends a hand but careful not to approach him,  "Please get away from the fridge."

 

"Does it have Medusa's head in it?"

 

"Please, just--" Before he could finish, Miyoshi quickly opened the fridge and swiftly scanned what might have been making Sakuma keep him away from it.  He spotted a small crimson box.  He reaches for it and actually got it, "What might be inside this bloody thing that you refuse to let me see--" when Miyoshi stopped momentarily to eye at it.  Something snapped in his mind as he sends a questioning look at Sakuma. 

 

The man sighs, he wanted to put more of a fight. He knows he'll lose but he would have keep it up just to make this a better proposal but this is Miyoshi.  There is no way out of this.

 

"Miyoshi," Sakuma starts, looking away. 

 

_Ah,  this would have been better but I was a fool._

 

"I have been planning about this for a month already. I have been thinking and thinking to make this moment more special and romantic because believe me,  I want it to be, just for you.." He pauses as he gulps, "But I can't think of how to do this properly."

 

He steals a glance to stare at Miyoshi, seeing nothing but impassiveness. Something inside Sakuma died, but he continues nonetheless. 

 

"The idea is not to tie you down to me or to assure myself that you're mine.  Well,  a part but maybe a small part only.  Like,  really small part maybe that," Sakuma doesn't know where this is going or how he is going to continue but he does.  He's now locking eyes with his boyfriend. 

 

"..but the very reason I'm doing this is just because I love you."

 

Hearing nothing else, Sakuma adds as he slowly approaches Miyoshi and takes his free hand, only you bring it to his lips and tenderly kiss the soft skin,  "..I love you so I want to make you feel special and loved. I seek nothing else,  but only your smile.  I desire nothing else,   but to see you every morning and greet you with kisses and assure you another lovely day with me. I wish for nothing else,  but for your happiness. You are beautiful,  Miyoshi and you know that. I just want to treasure and care for you for as long as I live. I wish for nothing else but to spend the rest of my life with you." 

 

Sakuma slightly nods and laughs a little,  the said laugh sounded so strained as if he's about to cry. With his nervous hands, he clasps his hands to wrap around Miyoshi's. 

 

"Can I please have this so I can do this properly?"

 

When Miyoshi's hold of the small box loosens,  Sakuma gently takes it from him. The latter kneels down on one knee as he snorts. "I don't know if I'm doing this right since I only saw this on movies but... Let me start..."

 

Clearing his hoarse throat, Sakuma finally speaks up,  looking at Miyoshi with his ever loving gaze. 

 

"I have nothing to offer aside from my mediocre work as Hatano once said, or from his house I inherited from my parents.  I'm happy enough you agreed to live with me here temporarily." With his most sincere voice and glassy-eyes,  Sakuma forms a soft smile...

 

"I can only give you the love that will assure you that I'll be with you until the afterlife. I'll give you the rest of my life,  so I was hoping you'd give me yours..."

 

Miyoshi's eyes are still on him, gazing and listening to his every words.

 

"...Miyoshi,  will you please give me the greatest pleasure of marrying you?"

 

It took a painful minute of exchanging gazes and reading of each other's expressions before Miyoshi snorts. He closes his eyes as he moves his lips to speak,  "You really are hopeless, aren't you,  Sakuma-san?"

 

Sakuma wasn't sure what to reply. His lips curl up into dissatisfaction. He couldn't read between the lines right now.  Either he's nervous or it's just Miyoshi. 

 

 

 

 

"You have been bothered for a month,  and I can make that out."

 

"You noticed?" Sakuma gulps,  was he that obvious? 

 

Miyoshi shakes his head slightly,  cracking his eyes open.  "No,  not the proposal. I actually didn't realize you would propose. I just worried something major is bothering you and this is just it."

 

"This is major--"

 

"--This is a major thing and you didn't prepare much. If you're going to propose,  I always thought it'd be exceptional. I expected much from you,  Sakuma-san."

 

 

 

Sakuma slumps his shoulders,  a look of sadness evident on his whole being. He should have known Miyoshi wouldn't agree to this.  This is too traditional and Miyoshi wouldn't want this.  Marriage?  Really? Sakuma was beginning to acknowledge that he is indeed an idiot by thinking this will work out.  Now not only did Miyoshi refuse him,  he was also beyond disappointed. And not to mention he scarred their relationship by proposing when they could have just stayed as they are;  lovers.  There should be no need for any paper certifying shit.  He's now taking into consideration what Jitsui said. But he also thought he did this because Kaminaga is right--he did this because he just loves Miyoshi and he wanted to take this into the next level of relationship. He wanted nothing but happiness for the both of them, especially Miyoshi. But he screwed up. Big time--

 

"You're helpless,  Sakuma-san." The words hurt more than it should.

 

 

 

 

 

"...And so am I..." 

 

Sakuma's eyes widened as he snaps his head to look up at Miyoshi. 

 

Miyoshi doesn't wear any facade or his signature _"You're an idiot and I'm beautiful"_ smirk. 

 

Instead,  Miyoshi is smiling genuinely,  and his face soft with tenderness and love. Which Sakuma only saw when he confessed years ago and Miyoshi accepted him. 

 

But now, Sakuma couldn't just say he was feeling happy.  He's still confused,  but happy. His mind is working out possible answers and clarifications from what Miyoshi said but his lover cleared it out for him. 

 

"This is much. You prepared much already. To be honest, I dreamed of a more grand proposal but when you just kneeled and asked me that question,  I felt nothing else but...love and contentment which, may be unusual for someone such as myself." Miyoshi lets out a small laugh, it's strained but Sakuma knows Miyoshi's about to cry but is just trying to fight it. Cry because of happiness. Yet Sakuma wasn't able to hide his tears when Miyoshi continued,

 

"I am helpless,  because how could I resist such a proposal?"

 

"As for your ridiculous question which you had to ask, " Miyoshi pauses,  joy seen all over his whole self. "Yes,  Sakuma-san.  I will marry you. I could use more of your romantics."

 

Sakuma's excitement and happiness is expressed when he immediately stands uo and scoops Miyoshi up in one go as he hugs the beautiful man in his arms. 

 

Miyoshi didn't resist, he instead continued to smile gleefully as Sakuma carries him around,  spluttering how he is the luckiest and happiness man alive.

 

"Sakuma-san,  you're exaggerating." it came out less like a sarcastic remark and more of a harmless comment.  

 

"You need to get used to exaggeration on events like these.  Also for my romantics." Sakuma says amidst his overly excited state.

 

Miyoshi replies with a smile and a shrug. "Aren't I used to that already being with you?"

 

Sakuma gently puts Miyoshi down but not releasing his hold of him.  He stares right into his lover's twinkling eyes reflecting of things he's sure they are both feeling;  love. 

 

 

Opening the tiny box that contains a shiny, silver ring adorned with carvings he couldn't quite make out at the moment (It didn't matter...) with a pretty red orb attached to it... Sakuma gives Miyoshi a look, Miyoshi smiles and nods.  

 

Miyoshi watched as Sakuma,  ever so carefully,  he slids the ring on Miyoshi's left index finger. An action that can be taken as an initiative to start something else new.  No, it's more of continuing and improving more what they have,  and what they will have for as long as both have each other. 

 

"It's a perfect fit." Sakuma comments. 

The taller man snorts and Miyoshi shakes his head while smiling.  The latter's eyes darts at the beautiful ring at his finger, Sakuma sure knows how to make his heart go faster; something no one else can do.  

 

 

Finally,  Sakuma rests and bumps his forehead gently to Miyoshi's.  Miyoshi complies and does the same.

 

Miyoshi could feel Sakuma's breath,  he grins when he felt Sakuma's lips brushed against his. He brings his lips closer and they closed and secured the moment with a kiss.  

 

It was just a chaste kiss,  though long and innocent, it is full with love. It symbolizes how their relationship will continue to be.

 

After what seemed like an eternity they spent,  they pulled away.  Who needs an eternal kiss when they can have an eternal love story? Sakuma really is the king of romantics. 

 

Both chuckles.  

 

"Forever?" Sakuma grins. 

 

"I used to not believe in such a thing." Miyoshi beams at him,  "But maybe you could make me believe it exists. Rather, you already did."

 

Staring at each other again,  they expressed more unspoken feelings by sealing it with another kiss.

 

 "Forever."

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! A continuation c:

Miyoshi snaps back into reality as soon as he slowly cracks his eyes open to the hideous view.  

 

A metal rod or of that sort painfully piercing his lung,  resulting into an immediate loss of blood that he knows will result to his death soon enough.  More than that is the excruciating pain whenever he tries to move (he finds out he can't really move much). 

 

It seems he went for a short slumber after he successfully stitched the important microfilm deep in his collar. A sleep that ended into a hallucination that seems to be born from his wide imagination. 

 

Was it really just an imagination? 

 

Or a premonition of the future?

 

Future? Aside from the circumstances he's facing right now,  the dream seemed too modern. Too romantic,  and too much for someone such as him. 

 

Then maybe,  it is an event that will happen in the next life. 

 

Miyoshi bitterly smiles at that thought. 

 

Happiness like marriage isn't suited for those who chose to dedicate their lives to espionage. Spies shouldn't even dream of that.  They should always hide their real identity, feign personalities and then cut ties as soon as their missions are complete. Emotions should be disregarded. Love for someone isn't an exception.

 

Why was it Sakuma?  Not Kaminaga or other spies?  It could have made sense if it's the others.  Sure he didn't feel that way towards them,  but he spent more time with them than with a certain lieutenant. 

 

Yet, _the dream didn't feel so wrong_.  

 

Miyoshi coughs, and the pain is back with more sting. And he knows this is his last mission. He knew he is going to die,  and he wasn't afraid. 

 

His life flashes in a fast pace. Remembering how he met Yuuki. How he voluntered to join the training and how he met others who went through the same harsh facility.  How they played poker, and how he met the military police's and D-agency's liaison.

 

The last memory made Miyoshi beam at nothing.  The thought on how Sakuma would panic if he's there with him and probably find a way to save him is slightly amusing. 

 

Yet why?  Why is it that he feels a strange ache on his chest? Aside from the physical pain brought by said rod,  something inside him hurts and wishes he can go out and survive this alive. 

 

Why?  Is it to see others again and tell them how he survived?  Is it to imply to Yuuki that he did best among them?  Or is it just to see _him_ again? 

 

He doesn't really know,  but he does know he doesn't have enough time to figure out which. His body is beginning to weaken more as blood oozes out. Limbs becoming numb. He tries to move his left hand;  he can't. Good thing he managed to hide the important piece of his mission before that happened.  

 

_What a vision..._

_Still..._

_It is a wonderful vision._

 

They say when one is dying,  their senses disappear one by one.  But Miyoshi classifies it as the truth as everything  starts to darken.  His sight becoming nothing but darkness (he knows his eyes are still slightly open as he's on his way to closing it). The nauseating smell of iron and broken machine begins to be gone as well.  The taste of cigarette he used earlier on is being nowhere. His sense of touch going down as he doesn't feel the pain anymore. 

 

Next to go is his sense of hearing--

 

"Miyoshi."

 

He heard something,  which is weird as no one there knows him as Miyoshi.  He is Maki.  Was Maki.  Was Miyoshi.  It must have been his imagination.

 

Or rather,  what he wanted to hear. 

That's right,  he'd recognize that voice anywhere. 

 

With the last intake of breath, he thinks, 

 

_Sakuma-san,  did you see the dream I had as well?_

Next thing that disappears is his sense of hearing;  the last one of his senses.

And thus, his consciousness disappears too, probably to continue the "wonderful vision" he had. 

 

 

••••

 

 

 

Miyoshi jolts away, his breathing heavy, panting loud. 

 

 

Sakuma follows after, worried eyes focused on Miyoshi. 

 

"What's wrong?" He asks his husband. 

 

"A dream."

 

"Dream?"

 

"I was involved in an train acciden--"

 

"Train accident!? What--"

 

"Calm down,  Sakuma-san. It's more like a memory..."

 

"What memory?" Sakuma places his hand on Miyoshi's back and forms circle on it. 

 

"Nhm," Miyoshi turns to send a reassuring smile at him, "It's nothing. It's the past. I'm okay. I'll be okay."

 

"No matter what that dream was,  Miyoshi,  I assure you that we'll be okay."

 

Miyoshi blinks,  before relaxing into yet another smile. 

"Yes. We'll be okay this time. "

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're wondering, yes. The first chapter did happen in the present. 
> 
> The last part happens after their marriage. Present!Miyoshi just saw a vision of his past(Past!Miyoshi) WHO also saw a vision of the future(which is the present now.)
> 
> I'll probably delete this by later lol c:

**Author's Note:**

> sorta ooc!
> 
> Comments are appreciated! Talk to me about this? Thank you!


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